It’s hard to write this section…I’ve heard it should be kept ‘short’ but how can I explain the depth and meaning of something so heavy and do it briefly?
Well, I’ll calm my racing heart and try to do my best…..
I have survived unspeakable crimes against humanity. I survived the hands of a psychopathic killer. I’m the only survivor that can speak for the silenced. I began this blog because I needed to give a voice to the Angels that did not survive. The dead walk with me as Angels of Secrets, I am reminded of them at every turn. I must give them a voice and in doing so, I pray to find peace for my own spirit; forgiveness for the self, forgiveness for each breath I take.
The Angels I speak of have proper names, but I will never use them; this is to respect the privacy of the surviving families. I will use symbolic names for the Angels, I hope that won’t be confusing for you. I plan to create a page dedicated to the Angels with a story for each, I think that would be a loving thing to do for them…but I’m finding that writing too painful right now. Please be patient, I’m doing my best.
It has become clear to me that these Angels of mine are part of something much larger, it’s far bigger than me, this I know for certain. I’ve quickly learned there are millions of Angels and You are one of them. Millions of people like you are outraged that crimes against humanity happen every day. If I were to dream larger than I can imagine right now, I would see my story being one that brings awareness and action so that Angels are no longer silenced. Angels have bravely shared their story here with me. I am humbled by your words, my heart sends you love and my prayer is that Angel wings raise you up in moments when you cannot lift your chin. We are all One, we are all part of humanity and each one of us has a moral responsibility to leave this world a better place.
I am Joan and I survived on Angels wings so I could write this with love, for You.
Blessings,
Joan
I would like to build a page that includes information on support and resources. If you have a website link you think might work, please email me directly at AngelsofSecrets@yahoo.com
If you or someone you know needs help please contact the USA National Suicide Hotline:
http://suicidehotlines.com/national.html
Disclaimer: This blog contains true accounts of my life and is meant for mature audiences only. Graphic, descriptive language may be used as appropriate. If you are offended by graphic, mature language then please move on to a blog that is more appropriate for you. I send you love.
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This is a very special blog, the name, so lovely as are the “inside” of secrets that we hold, tender, longing parts that ache to heal. I hope that your journey and mission helps many,
Linda
thank you for stopping by my blog Say sumthn ; I love your space here and am honoured to have a chance to read this. Love is such a precious thing. The hurt it causes, the breaking wounds that heal differently..
Oh I love that you are so open hearted. You will love like only you can. Somethings may never leave, but new things arrive. Like rain and dew. Ah you will notice Life’s gifts cuz you ve learnt to take nothn for granted. Those of us who have lost much, give much. It heals the earth in ways too global to see just yet.
you are healed……for the truth shall set you free. it is through the power of love that we heal ourselves. by your reveal – you release the greatest secret of them all…….
Love is the gift we give ourselves when we are free to just be. You share- and the power and strength of your light grows ever stronger. Do you feel it within your very being? The release of the pain kept so long as your guide – a guide that skewed your light to the dark hallways. Keeping you hidden.
your voice, so richly expressed, is a light in the tunnel of injury and shame. let it ring like a bell – chiming the everlasting toll ti has taken from your life.
you are free little “angel.” go forward and be blessed in the light of the sun that is your truth.
Thank you for liking my post. I am truly honored I could share a bit of beauty. I was touched to tears by your blog and admire your strength.
Thank you so much for stopping by and liking my post. Your writing is so moving and yet a little heartbreaking. It is hard to stop reading. I do hope that you are able to find peace while writing your secrets.
Beautiful to see that you’re using art/expression as you move through difficult space. Keep at it. Glad you found my site – I trust it will bring notes of love/brightness into your world.
Truly wonderful is your spirit to give these words to the world.
I’m happy you visited my site and have subcribed, thank you and I hope you find something for you amongst my words.
Breathing is the force that keeps alive the strength of life – my poem “4 of 6 – Breath” helps to reach our souls.
Your ideas stir creation, wind follows your breath.
Thank you for visiting me.
Your words are inspirational,the pain that has visited you on this life’s journey will leave you as you write and expose your fears.Please do not be afraid and focus on love I will send as much love as I can to try and ease your struggle,love,gary,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,
Thank you So much for sharing your story and for finding me I accidentally declined your follow request on twitter :( I’m really sorry.
I have absolutely no clue what you are going through, but your story has started helping me deal with my past experiences. I certainly haven’t been through anything like you but I have been through an awful lot in my 16 years of life. For the most part I just try to forget about it and pretend that nothing happened to me. Seeing you share your story is helping me to heal and get through my story. Thank you Very much.
Joan,
May you find the peace that you seek in the grace and love of Christ, for it is there. And He does care for you. Someone once told me that my ‘mess’ of life (being raped as a child) was God’s way of preparing me to minister His love toward someone else who needs it perhaps more than me in that moment. I pray that you continue to let your mess be your message as well and that God will work in you and through you to touch others.
Thank you for reading my blog post this morning. My prayers go with you.
Blessings,
Rhonda
I thought I was alone, even though I knew that I wasn’t really. You stopped by my blog and hit “like” on a posting. I was startled that someone read my voice crying out to the universe. Thank you.
Your words here, they are special. They have meaning. You are a survivor, in so many ways. I feel the love you have for others like us. I spills out from my screen. Thank you. I will pray for you starting tonight for grace, for peace and for strength.
I will pray for you too my sweet Angel friend. Blessings and love be yours, Joan
Somehow God knew that we would need one another. In our childlike grieving, we cried out.. those cries reverberating through time past like ripples upon a deep puddle. Here we are now — reaching out. I’ll hold your hand, you hold mine. We can bear the pain now… through sharing it.
Adrienne
I hope you too, get some peace from your sharing
Mark
I pray the Lord give you the strength to complete what you have started here, to share the stories of the Angels you have known so that your word can be an encouragement to other Angels who thought they were along. Peace, Linda
I don’t know what to say… thank you for sharing your strength with us. Continue to persevere. Time will be your greatest ally.
J
Thank you so much for stopping by my blog! I have been through a lot of pain and suffering as of late and I can totally relate to the content on your blog. Keep being positive and utilizing your experiences to help heal others as well as yourself. I wish you all the best!
Namaste,
James
Thanks for visiting my blog!
I’m a survivor of crimes against humanity myself, and I commend you for having the courage to write this beautiful blog (this is something I still struggle with). I am moved by your words and I look forward to reading more :)
I’m so sorry for all the pain and suffering you went through. My prayers are with you for your healing and divine guidance. Thank you for visiting and subscribing to my site. I truly hope you’ll find something helpful and valuable. Keep the faith! Blessings and love & light!!!
Prayers of love for you. ♥
Thank you for stopping by my blog the other day, and I didn’t expect to find such a moving story once I finally got the time to visit yours. You will be in my prayers. Truly you will.
You are loved and loveable. Everything about you radiates light. I am honored to read your blog.
I cried. Amazing Survival. I’ve personally been broken at the had of an abuser, but not shattered. I cannot imagine your shattering pain. Though I do not know you, you are beautiful. I hope to meet the angels you describe some day.
I am honored to know your acquaintance.
i just stopped by here, because i saw that you had been on my blog. and i am so humbled that you have visited me. i will most definitely be back & read about your angels. thank you for spreading love and hope to the world. ~liz
As someone who has very close friends and relatives who have been through some traumatic events and as a case worker for over 20 years, your words sound very familiar to me. I wrote a song a few years ago dedicated to all those who find the strength to carry on. As soon as I get it uploaded I will send you a copy and you are free to share with others. God bless you and continue to use your courage to encourage others.
You are a brave and bright soul. Thank you so much for sharing your story, for bringing compassion and thoughtfulness to the topics, thank you for helping others.
I have nominated you for the Liebster Blog Award: http://wp.me/pVGxj-8O
Someone I recently met online (at http://rosecityremona.wordpress.com) introduced me to your blog, and even though I’ve only read your introduction so far, I’ve already subscribed to your blog and hope to spend some time learning more about your journey. I am someone over fifty who still lives with the lingering scars of a broken childhood. Even though I spent a considerable amount of time in my twenties and thirties undergoing intensive counseling in an effort to heal, I find that in this later stage of life there are new issues rising to the surface and demanding to be acknowledged. I wish you discernment and healing on your journey. Every day is a chance to heal from the secrets that bind us together. I send you love, and strength, in abundance.
I’m glad you’ve found my blog. I hope that you find strength in the secrets I share. Thank you for reading. Blessings and Angels love to you. Love, Joan
God bless & lots of love always…
Thank you for sharing…i’m addicted.
-Emma
Thank you for your perfect writing. I feel honored you read my site and I hope I give you happiness.
http://wp.me/P22s4y-pR
Joan,
I like to give you the Candle Lighter Award. Check out the link above or my Award Page. It is a very pretty award and you do not have to follow any rules or jump any hoops to receive. You simple accept it, if you like. If you choose to give a candle to another inspirational blog you enjoy, feel free to do so.
Take care, this is truly a beautiful blog.
Renee
Speachless!
Dear Angles of Secrets,
I have started a letter to you, in my mind and on paper, many times. Many time I dissolve into tears and cannot go further. Please forgive me, for I could not read much of what you’d written. The words I did take in haunt me. They float into my conscience at the least expected times. They are there when I look at my daughter, when I read or watch people passing by. And the horror they portray wafts rancid.
I have no understanding of what you went through or of how you survived it and now find the courage to retell it. The strength and will of survival in you is something beyond admiration. It seems like a sort of tattered heroism; truly heroic but at a deadening cost. I admire your honesty and the courage it takes to write of your experiences. The heart and soul of you is, in my mind, a flame of a candle. Burning delicately, steadfastly, lighting darkness from the inside out, frail and easy to extinguish, yet burning still, and attracting more flames in the darkness, lending light to light.
You “liked” my blog post written in honor of my daughter on her birthday. Since then you have not left my mind or my heart. Since then I have prayed for you, cried over you and begged for words to utter that could possibly make any difference. I do not know those words yet, but I do now pray for your increased freedom. That as you are freer and freer your words and the power you have to bring light into others’ dark horrors will increase in strength until there is no more darkness and the possibility of such horrors abolished.
I pray that Peace restores your most inner self, that the truest freedom is yours and that peace radiates from within you to all those you help.
I am moved far beyond a place that words could ever reach by your story and the stories of the secret Angels whose testament you share with the world. You have shown me beyond anything I have ever read, seen, heard, or felt the power of love in the human spirit–and, moreover, the horrors that living without it produce. I send as much love and light as I have in me to you and your Angels. I wish you blessings.
Hey Joan. I miss you. I nominated you for the versatile blogger award because you rock and I wanted to share your story. I hope you are doing ok and that you come back soon.
http://playingwithwordsisfun.wordpress.com/2012/04/27/1603/
Hi Joan, I have just completed reading your blog and am taken away by it all… I went home yesterday and cried a bit as I told some of your story to my husband and we prayed for continued strength and courage for you! Its difficult for me to imagine your pain and the struggles over the years I guess because I am fortunate to have known a mothers love and a fathers love.. I hate that you & others like you have fought so hard to survive these ordeals that we rarley hear of! I honor you and pray for continued strength to speak for those Angels, to be a voice for those who have passed on and tell your story! SHOUT IT from the top of a mountain.. it is real, it did happen! I dont know how exactly I stumbled upon your blog but I could not stop reading because of your words that are sooo filled with LOVE inspite of your pain! Thank you for sharing! I look forward to hearing from you again!